Robbing From Berle to Pay Schecky, Henny & Wright

I was getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, "Send one of my bags to New York, send one to Los Angeles, and send one to Miami." She said, "We can't do that!" I told her, "You did it last week!"

My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said "Cough!"

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."

I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.

The hotel I'm Blogging from has a lovely closet ... a nail.

There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.

This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.

I've been married so many times I have rice marks on my face.

An Irishman walks out of a bar... Hey, it COULD happen!

What does an insomniac dyslexic atheist do at night? He stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

If Russia attacked Turkey from the rear, would Greece help?

If I ever have twins, I'd use one for parts.